Tough guys never give up. That’s what makes them cute

Jobs, Journalism, Justice

Dr. Wes Browning is a one time math professor who has experienced homelessness several times. He supplied the art for the first cover of Real Change in November of 1994 and has been involved with the organization ever since. This is his weekly column, Adventures in Irony, a dry verbal romp of the absurd. He can be reached at drwes@realchangenews.org.

Articles by Dr. Wes Browning

Are fascists going downhill in more ways than one?

by Dr. Wes Browning | January 20th, 2021

All of a sudden after more than five years of seeing tweet after tweet from at realdonaldtrump all night long while he devours cheeseburgers and fries in bed, now Twitter bans him. Now as he’s on his way out. And then Facebook bans him. Gee thanks, guys, for saving the country from all that.

Politico reported this morning (it’s last Friday to you) that Joe Biden’s inauguration was being postponed. I was stunned. Then I read the article and found out that the rehearsal was being postponed. The rehearsal — not the inauguration itself. Politico yanked my chain.

Read more in the Jan. 20-26, 2021 issue.

How many emperors invited barbarians to sack Rome?

by Dr. Wes Browning | January 13th, 2021

In the waning days of his presidency, Trump is resembling evil genius Sideshow Bob, stepping on rakes. Or, Wile E. Coyote running into walls painted to look like tunnel entrances.

Betsy DeVos resigned as secretary of education because Trump’s handling of the Capitol Hill riot has set a bad example for America’s children. But she had no problem with the Access Hollywood tape?

She followed many other administration officials who resigned the day before, including Elaine Chao, the transportation secretary and wife of Sen. Mitch McConnell.

Read more in the Jan. 13-19, 2021 issue.

You never know what you’ll find out when you get an adult talking

by Dr. Wes Browning | January 6th, 2021

It’s New Year’s Eve as I write this. I was thinking I’d list some New Year’s resolutions, but midnight is still hours away. So, for now, I’m more in the mood to look back. Way back.

One of the aspects of my life that has given me the most satisfaction has been the fact that I’ve been able to carry on reasonably amiable conversations with a huge range of people from all walks of life. The range is so huge that when I share this fact in detail, a lot of people get horrified.

Trump’s Space Force beware. Cthulhu hates Renaissance architecture

by Dr. Wes Browning | December 30th, 2020

We got the tunnel replacement for the viaduct because West Seattle and Ballard wanted to drive back and forth between each other. Now West Seattle wants aerial cable cars to get to and from the International District. Since I live in the International District, I’m naturally concerned. Where will all the West Seattleites go when they debark? Please let it not be any of my favorite restaurants. I’m looking at wait times for tables when the pandemic settles down.

Read more in the Dec. 30, 2020 - Jan. 5, 2021 issue.

If you’re going to bet on outcomes that really matter to you, learn the concept “hedge”

by Dr. Wes Browning | December 23rd, 2020

I didn’t think I’d be able to say this by now, with the pandemic and the ongoing post-election drama, but I’m starting to feel safe enough: Merry Christmas, and goodbye Bill Barr.

Read more in the Dec. 23-29, 2020 issue.

Why do we even have mayors, anyway? We don’t want them to do nothing and we don’t want them to do what they do

by Dr. Wes Browning | December 16th, 2020

Back at the end of September, I predicted that if the outcome of the election was such that the Supreme Court was called on to weigh in, they wouldn’t intervene. They’d leave it to the states. I implied there might be two justices who’d back a coup for Trump, but the other seven had no interest in such things. Well, then Amy Coney Barrett got on the court, so maybe three justices would do something crazy. But in the first draft of this column last week, I correctly guessed that the court would shut down the Texas lawsuit.

Read more in the Dec. 16-22, 2020 issue.

No ‘Welcome Back, Kotter,’ either

by Dr. Wes Browning | December 9th, 2020

We want our second stimulus check. Now former Democratic U.S. congressperson and early 2020 presidential candidate John Delaney has an idea to get us all $1,500 in stimulus money, provided we get one of the new COVID-19 vaccines. He thinks Congress might approve stimulus checks sooner if it gets people vaccinated sooner.

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark...

by Dr. Wes Browning | December 2nd, 2020

As soon as I saw the headline “Thousands of mink culled over COVID fears rise from a mass grave in Denmark,” I thought it stands to reason 2020 would end with a Zombie Mink Apocalypse. How could this awful year get any worse? Zombie minks.

US democracy is hanging by a thread

by Dr. Wes Browning | November 25th, 2020

What are the Republican Michigan legislators who agreed to talk to President Trump about their state’s certification of the election thinking? What’s the point of talking with him about it except to see what he can offer them in exchange for meddling with the electoral process?

Read more in the Nov 25 - Dec 1, 2020 issue.

Tough guys never give up. That’s what makes them cute

by Dr. Wes Browning | November 18th, 2020

I’m writing this from last Friday the Thirteenth. Unlike most people, I like Friday 13thses because I’ve always had good times during them. Ever since I flew a red-eye flight across the country on a Friday 13th and asked specifically for a 13th-row seat and had the whole row to myself, I have known that other people’s superstitions can work in my favor.

Read more in the Nov. 18-24, 2020 issue.